Augie NAF Campaign Strategists Huddle

Hearing this news has re-energized the hopes of some within the Dopeycrat Party, but others who have actually READ the polls are increasingly unhappy.  Gore continues to capitalize on his post-convention bounce, but Augie NAF has yet to manage a hop.   According to Spokesbasset Gilbert (pictured, right), campaign strategists have advised Augie to follow Gore's successful strategy of daily policy pronouncements and attacks on other candidates' positions.  Despite this barrage of publicity, the Dopeycrat ticket not yet been mentioned in any national poll.

While Bush and Gore enjoy the holiday weekend, Augie NAF is meeting with his key campaign aides to plot their strategy for the fall campaign.  According to Spokesbasset Gilbert, those key advisers include Dopeycrat Party Chair Rebel Hatt, Propaganda Master Melvin Cheek, and Presidential Chef Zeke Spector.  Also seen sneaking into the Dopeycrat Compound was the elusive Molli Thorpe, rumored to be vying for the position of Starlet to the President.

A Dopeycrat campaign insider reveals that some party contributors are becoming concerned enough that they have hired consultant Naomi Basset.  Basset is a feminist well known for her work converting beta males to alpha lead dogs.  Observers believe she'll be recommending that Augie replace his trademark hat and tails for simple earthtone dog collars.  Ms. Basset is believed to be receiving well over a ton of pigs ears each week from Dopeycrat supporters.

Notably absent from this weekend's Dopeycrat summit was VP Candidate Moose.  Some analysts wonder whether da Moose wasn't brought onto the ticket as a political ploy or a way to get the slush funds promised by the Steal Industry's Anti-Counter Cruising Crusade.  Augie has consistently and vehemently denied this accusation.  However Moose has been lying low and doesn't appear to be part of the inner circle of Dopeycrat advisors.  When he has appeared in public with Augie, da Moose is kept in the background and has not been allowed to speak.

As the presidential campaign reaches a peak, Dopeycrat faithful hope that Augie will emerge with a lead in the polls immediately after Labor Day and never lose it.  Realists say the Dopeycrats are smoking it.