Hidden 18 Minutes Could Be Revealed

September 21, 2000 -- At a recent Dopeycrat rally, there was an 18 1/2 minute gap in a speech made by VP Candidate da Moose.  The Dopeycrat party's explanation was that it was an accident, and may have been perpetrated by the candidate for White House Handyman, Pwince MacGyver Shroyer (pictured, left).  At today's news conference, Shroyer demonstrated how he accidentally used duct tape instead of recording tape in the machine, resulting in a sticky situation indeed.  Coincidentally enough, this so-called Handyman was once a Plumber.

Meanwhile experts are analyzing the recorded tapes of the speech, and all that can be heard is a buzz.  Rally attendees say that the 18 1/2 minute gap was no more than Moose's repeated feeble attempts to form a thought.   The buzz was likely to be the sound of the audience snoring.